I don't need love, I am Love, you need me.

kanin, galit at realisasyon

Habang naghuhugas ako ng pinagkainan naming medyo matagal nang nakatambay sa aming lababo, sumiklab ang inis ko dahil pahirapan yata ang pagtanggal ng kanin na nakadikit sa platong iyon. Tigang na kasi siya. Tumigas na. Kahit dinamihan ko na ng sabon ay mahirap pa rin siyang tanggalin. Bakit? Napagtanto kong malakas na ang kanyang kapit sa plato dahil matagal na siyang nakadikit doon. Naisip ko lang… na ganyan ang mangyayare kung mag-aalaga ka ng galit sa puso mo. Habang tumatagal ang paglalage niyan sa puso mo, mahihirapan kang tanggalin yan. Ano pa kaya kung inalagaan mo pa, diba? Mas lalo kang mahihirapan. Mas lalo kang mahihirapang tanggalin ang poot, ang galit, ang hinanakit kung pinatagal mo pa. Wag kang mag-alaga ng ganyang klaseng pakiramdam sa puso mo. Isipin mong kung magagalit ka man sa isang tao, hindi niya ikakapanget iyan, hindi niya ikamamatay iyan, bagkus ay ikaw lang din ang mahihirapan. Likas sa atin ang magalit dahil hindi tayo perpekto pero huwag mong patagalin ang galit na yun. Matuto kang magpatawad. Palayain mo ang sarili mo sa poot. Huwag mong alagaan para hindi na lumago at magbunga pa ng panibagong galit. Minsan ang pagtanggap at pagpapatawad lang ang susi para malusaw mo ang galit. Huwag mong hahayaang maging katulad ng kaning tigang na nakadikit sa plato ang galit na iyan na namamayani sa puso mo ngayon kung meron man kasi mahirap tanggalin, ikaw lang din ang mahihirapan.

(Source: msshearty)

 
16 hours ago —43 notes

I don’t demand you to be someone that you’re not.
I don’t demand you to write me a poetry
Or compose me a song.
If you can’t and if you won’t, then hush baby,
Because I would still love everything about you.
—just in case you didn’t know, msshearty
 
1 day ago —129 notes

“Sssh. I know.” Putol niya sa akin, nakangisi. “Wag kang mag-aalala, mag-iingat ako. Makikita mo pa ko bukas. Susunduin pa kita bukas.” Bahagya niyang inilapit ang mukha niya sa tenga ko. “At ipagpapatuloy ko pa ang pagmamahal ko sayo bukas.” Mikel, Love & Betrayal


“Sssh. I know.” Putol niya sa akin, nakangisi. “Wag kang mag-aalala, mag-iingat ako. Makikita mo pa ko bukas. Susunduin pa kita bukas.” Bahagya niyang inilapit ang mukha niya sa tenga ko. “At ipagpapatuloy ko pa ang pagmamahal ko sayo bukas.” Mikel, Love & Betrayal

(Source: msshearty)


2 days ago —24 notes

It shouldn’t be kasi sanay ka na. No. Di dapat ganyan. Siguro at some point nagkamali ka, nabagsak ka or nadapa ka. Pero hindi nadedefine ng pagkakamali mong yun kung sino ka. Wag mong sanayin sarili mo sa mga pagkakamaling akala mo depenesyon ng pagkatao mo. No. Wag mong patunayan sa ibang tao ang nakikita nilang mali sayo na alam mong hindi naman talga ikaw. Instead baliin mo yun. Hindi ka sanay. Sinasanay mo lang talga ang sarili mo.

(Source: msshearty)

 
3 days ago —66 notes

“Tol, balita ko sising-sisi ka raw sa nagawa mo? Dinig ko rin gabi gabi ka raw umiiyak? Kawawa naman pala ang mama mo sa kakalaba ng pillow case na pinangbalot sa mga unang iniyakan mo. Nakakatawa. Ikaw, ikaw ang nakakatawa. Huwag kang lumingon sa likod mo kasi ikaw ang tinutukoy ko. Nakakatawa ka, hindi dahil kalalaki mong tao ay umiiyak ka pero dahil ikaw na nga itong may kasalanan kung bakit natapon ang gatas, ikaw pa itong umiiyak. Umiyak ka man ng ilang libong drum dyan ay hindi mo na maibabalik ang kahapon. Nangyare na. Kinakatakutan mo palang mangyare ang mawala sa buhay mo ang mahal mo pero ano iyang ginawa mo? Sige sabihin na nating aksidente ang lahat pero gago, may mahal ka na, bat ka pumatol?

Kung nasa tamang katinuan ka at iniisip mo ang magiging pakiramdam ng butihin mong girlfriend, sana di ka na lang sumama. Alangan namang magpakamartyr ng todo ang mahal mo diba? Siguro nga alam niyang mahal mo siya pero tol, nagtaksil ka. Makonsensya ka naman. Hindi basta na lang magiging colorless na parang elementong hangin ang gusot na pinasukan mong yan. Alam mo namang mapanganib at traydor ang alak, minsan nagiging demonyo ka pag naging dominante na sa katawan mo ang likidong yan at tao ka lang, nasa tabi tabi lang din ang tukso pero bakit kasi sinimulan mo pa? Edi ang ending naging bata? Hindi naman pwedeng ipaglaban pa rin ng girlfriend mo ang pagmamahalan ninyong dalawa kung alam ninyong pareho na may masasagasaan nang bata.

Hindi rin pwedeng ipalaglag mo ang inosenteng fetus na yan dahil gusto mong maging kayo pa rin ng girlfriend mo. Tol, alam na naming tanga ka kaya huwag mo nang panindigan pa. Nakakaurat. Tapos ngayon paiyak iyak ka? Hindi kasalanan ng alak kung bakit mo siya ininom at nakadisgrasya ka. Minsan tayo lang din ang gumagawa ng sarili nating kalungkutan. Kasi tanga. Kasi hindi nag-iisip ng magiging kalabasan. Tol, payong kaibigan sabay tapik sa iyong balikat, tumahan ka na’t baka makaramdam pa iyang anak mong nadedevelop pa lang sa sinapupunan ng hindi mo inakalang magiging ina ng mga supling mo ang katangahan mo. Bilang magiging tatay ka na, wag mong ipasa ang tungkod ng pagiging tanga ha?”

Dahil Tanga Ka #2, "Nakabuntis Ako"

(Source: msshearty)

 
3 days ago —97 notes

“Ilang taon mo na nga siyang minamahal? Tagal na no? Ilang palit na ng girlfriend ang nagawa niya, ilang manliligaw na ang dumaan sayo, ilang bagyo na ang naminsala sa kapuluan ng Pilipinas, ilang pangako na ang napako ng taga lingkod bayan, nakailang anak na ang kapitbahay niyo, at nakailang alagang baboy na ang Papa mo pero minamahal mo pa rin siya. Aba matindi. Nakailang 11:11 wishes ka na kaya? Nakailang alas kwatro ng umaga na kaya ang iniyak mo’t pangalan pa rin niya ang dahilan? Ilang move on na ba yung nasabi mo? Di mo na mabilang ano? Tapos until now going strong ka pa rin sa kakamahal sa kanya.

Come on! Hindi ka pa rin ba nagsasawa sa ganyang setup? Palihim na nagmamahal, paulit ulit na nasasaktan, at minsan pa’y pumupuslit ka pa ng pagdadasal para sa pansariling kaligayahan. Ang ano? Sana maghiwalay na sila ng girlfriend niya o sana ikaw naman ang makita niya? Girl, move on. Alam ko naman na kailangan mo munang pumasok sa kabaong bago mo maappreciate yang pariralang yan pero di ka ba naaawa sa sarili mo? Ang move on ay para rin lang naman sayo. Exercise it. Laklak ka din minsan ng realidad. Hinahambalos na nga sa pagmumukha mo, pablind blind ka pa. Ilang anesthesia ba ang tinira mo’t ganyan ka na kamanhid?

Tigilan mo yan. Hindi na healthy yang ginagawa mong torture sa sarili mo. Ilang buto na ba ang nabali mo sa tuwing nakikita mo siyang may kasamang iba? Ilang beses ka na bang nanlumo dahil sweet sila ng girlfriend niya? Ilang beses ka na bang nagmura dahil sa kakamahal sa kanya? Ilang beses ka na bang umiyak sa kwarto mo ng sobrang mahina para lang di marinig ng mga kasama mo sa bahay? Saksi ang unan mo’t kama sa mga ginagawa mo sa sarili mo. Saksi ang kinailalimang parte ng puso mo dyan sa kakaibig mo sa kanya tapos ang idinulot lang sayo ay pawang sakit at hinagpis.

Isipin mo sanang mabuti na hindi ka inire ng nanay mo para umiyak ng paulit ulit para sa isang walang kwentang tao. Bakit? Sa tuwing nag-ggm ba siya sayo ng quotes tapos agad agad kang nagpapaload para lang mareplyan siya, naaappreciate niya? Girl, wala yang pake. Parang ulam lang yan eh, nakakaumay kapag palagi, nakakasama pag sumobra. Try mong kainin yung ulam na move on tapos inom ka ng isang litrong acceptance at magtoothbrush ka ng panibagong mindset na hindi siya worth it. May halaga ka, wag mong sayangin yun sa kanya. Aanhin mo yang pagmamahal mong yan kung nakakalimutan mo naman ang halaga mo? Girl, iluwa mo na yang katangahang yan, di yan nakakabusog.”

Dahil Tanga Ka #1, “Kaytagal Na Kitang Minamahal”

(Source: msshearty)

 
3 days ago —156 notes

I want you to want me.
I want you to take care of my body when demons seem to be like weeds I didn’t even planted in my own garden.
I want you to capture my every state and treasure them as if it will not happen ever again.
I want you to be afraid of losing me as the way I fear of losing you.
I want you to not blame me for having trust issues and social difficulties.
I want you to understand why I often times push good people away because you knew I’m just scared they’ll turn into evil ones.
I want you to be an open container that I won’t be sorry and feel intimidated every time I fill my secrets in it.
I want you to be like my ear that will listen to all of my hideous thoughts without judging any of them.
I want you to tell me how amazing I am for being stronger after having fucked up thoughts and for over thinking things most of the time.
I want you to scold me when I’m being an unreasonable bitch and you’ll tell me I’m better than that without walking away afterwards because the latter will be a total ache for the both of us.
I want you to tell me your i love you’s through your deeds, in between your choice of cheesy songs and corny jokes and even when I’m asleep.
I want you to notice the struggles in my eyes every time there’s a civil war between my heart and my mind without even telling that there was.
I want you to annoyingly ask me what is my problem until I spill them out.
I want you to let me cry like a baby by your comforting words and soothing laughter because you know it will be just a story in future time.
I want you to not let me drink too much coffee and soda and cry too much over undeserving people because you know it will only bring no good to me but you’ll allow me every time I needed them badly.
I want you to listen to my I’m okay’s without telling me that you know I’m not because you know I’m lying and you know it is my way of calming myself and you’ll just patiently wait until I say that I’m not.
I want you to read my writings and acknowledge the way I use metaphors and adjectives.
I want you to congratulate me for channeling my sad thoughts and frustrations into stories and writings.
I want you to respect me the way you respect your mother.
I want you to get angry every time I wear short shorts because you’re afraid enough that somebody will notice the things you have noticed to me but you’ll just let me wear those anyway because at the back of your mind you know that I am yours.
I want you to still see my body as wonderland even after you saw how scarred it was.
I want you to not get tired of loving me.
I want you to know that I’m not demanding you to be perfect because you’re not and will never be.
I want you to be there after all of the thunderstorms I have let you to witness.
I want you to treat them as privilege because you know there is only a handful of people got to see them.
I want you to be my best friend as I will wait until God will end my existence.
I want you to not run away if without me.
I want you to be there for me.

Just be there for me.
—my little wants i know is too much to ask | msshearty
 
3 days ago —1041 notes

Do not label people. Do not generalize. Just because you knew some guy na paasa doesn’t mean lahat na ng lalaki ganun ang pag-uugali and that doesn’t guarantee na ang mga babae ay hindi ganun. At some point, umaasa din ang lalaki at nagpapaasa rin ang babae. Be rational enough to weigh things and do not be unfair. Hindi santa lahat ng babae at hindi rin gago lahat ng lalaki. I’m not taking any sides. Gusto ko lang sabihing hindi lahat ganoon. May kilala akong lalaking gago, meron din akong kilalang babae na gaga. At hindi lahat ng lalaki paasa, may babae ring ganoon. May babaeng pa fall, sweet sa lahat at pretender. Just please do not generalize. Lahat ng tao may balahurang pag-uugali at hindi yan nadedetermine sa kung ano ang gender niya.

(Source: msshearty)

 
3 days ago —45 notes


 
1 week ago —1006 notes


herpointsofview:

herpointsofview:

Birthday Books Giveway. (True Believer, At First Sight, Safe Haven and The Best of Me all by Nicholas Sparks.)

  • You don’t need to follow me, just reblog this without deleting the text post.
  • Message me which book you prefer, only one (1) book. This means I will be picking 4 random bloggers.
  • For Philippines residents only, willing to entrust to me his/her name and complete address, shipping fee will be charged to me don’t worry. 
  • Your Tumblr Ask must be open, I’ll contact you right after I chose the winner.

4 Winners will be announced and I will message them on August 11 (my birthday). Hahaha, first time to so I’m not sure kung maraming magpaparticipate. I just want to giveaway these good books, sayang if they’ll be stuck in our minilibrary. 

Those who messaged me their choice of book, please inform me if ever you changed/will change your url on or before August 10, 2014.

 
1 week ago —444 notes

It’s either tumakbo ka o tatanga tanga kang naglalakad kaya ka natalisod o nadapa o baka may nanulak sayo. Edi ano, nasugatan ka. So masakit, mahapdi, feel na feel mo yung kirot. Pwera nalang kung manhid ka na, tipong dakilang walang feelings na. Ang sinasabi ko lang ay imposibleng wala kang ginawa kaya ka nagalusan. Hindi pwedeng nakatayo ka lang dyan kaya ka nasugatan. Hindi magic ang sugat. Kumbaga sa love, pag nagmahal ka, imposibleng hindi ka masasaktan. Imposible ring bigla ka nalang masasaktan na wala man lang dahilan. Ano, baliw lang? Kaya do not expect love to be perfect. Hindi pwedeng hindi ka masasaktan, nagmahal ka eh.

(Source: msshearty)

 
1 week ago —58 notes

These days, your trust is always at stake. Wag na wag mo talgang ipapamigay lang basta basta ang tiwala mo. Mahirap kasi pag nasira iyon. Feeling mo wasak din ang pagkatao mong nakaimpart na doon sa taong pinagkatiwalaan mo.
—Ellaine Almira, Love Betrayal

(Source: msshearty)

 
2 weeks ago —52 notes

Well speaking of heartbreak, it’s normal. You won’t be able to appreciate love without it. The world’s not made to be the constant sphere of happiness.
—this is what he said when i broke his heart, msshearty
 
2 weeks ago —195 notes

Kung humihinga ka pa sa pagkakataong ito, be thankful. Bawat araw ay pagkakataon at hindi lahat ng tao nabibigyan ng pagkakataon. For at least a second, may taong namamatay kaya ikaw? You should be thankful kasi humihinga ka pa din sa mga oras na ‘to. You’re blessed enough because you are still alive and kicking. Kung may gusto kang gawin, gawin mo na. Do not procrastinate. Walang maidudulot na mabuti yan. Work it out kung tinatamad ka. Isipin mong maigi ang maaaring mawala sayo kung di mo yan gagawin at maaaring mangyare kung aatupagin mo yan ngayon. Evaluate it. Timbang-timbangin mo. Kung may gusto ka namang sabihin sa isang tao na alam mong kailangan niyang malaman, then sabihin mo agad. Huwag mong ipagpabukas pa kung alam mong kaya mo namang sabihin ngayon. Minsan kasi nawawala sa atin ang isang bagay dahil hindi natin pinagbuksan ang pagkakataong kumakatok na sa ating buhay. Kumbaga eh nandyan na sana kaso anong ginawa mo? Maybe tiningnan mo lang. Maybe hinayaan mo lang. Maybe pinagpabukas mo lang. Wag ganon. Gawin mo na dapat ang gusto mong gawin ngayon. Sabihin na ang dapat sabihin. Unlimited ang chances, yes. Pero minsan kasi yung “next time nalang” is always too far. At minsan din, hindi na kailanman nangyayare. “Tick tock” tumatakbo ang oras. Hindi yan titigil para lang mahabol mo ang chance na tumatakbo na papalayo sayo.

+

Kung humihinga ka pa sa pagkakataong ito, be thankful. Bawat araw ay pagkakataon at hindi lahat ng tao nabibigyan ng pagkakataon. For at least a second, may taong namamatay kaya ikaw? You should be thankful kasi humihinga ka pa din sa mga oras na ‘to. You’re blessed enough because you are still alive and kicking. Kung may gusto kang gawin, gawin mo na. Do not procrastinate. Walang maidudulot na mabuti yan. Work it out kung tinatamad ka. Isipin mong maigi ang maaaring mawala sayo kung di mo yan gagawin at maaaring mangyare kung aatupagin mo yan ngayon. Evaluate it. Timbang-timbangin mo. Kung may gusto ka namang sabihin sa isang tao na alam mong kailangan niyang malaman, then sabihin mo agad. Huwag mong ipagpabukas pa kung alam mong kaya mo namang sabihin ngayon. Minsan kasi nawawala sa atin ang isang bagay dahil hindi natin pinagbuksan ang pagkakataong kumakatok na sa ating buhay. Kumbaga eh nandyan na sana kaso anong ginawa mo? Maybe tiningnan mo lang. Maybe hinayaan mo lang. Maybe pinagpabukas mo lang. Wag ganon. Gawin mo na dapat ang gusto mong gawin ngayon. Sabihin na ang dapat sabihin. Unlimited ang chances, yes. Pero minsan kasi yung “next time nalang” is always too far. At minsan din, hindi na kailanman nangyayare. “Tick tock” tumatakbo ang oras. Hindi yan titigil para lang mahabol mo ang chance na tumatakbo na papalayo sayo.

(Source: msshearty)

 
2 weeks ago —145 notes

Blog like you don’t care. Grammar-freaks are everywhere. Whether you’re good at tenses or not, sucks at playing words or can write like a great poet, they will still examine your compositions just to get reasons to make you look awful to others, just so before you know it. Just blog and blog and blog, there’s so many things to blog about, don’t mind those people who are great in making you feel like you aren’t a good one, you’re good enough, you’re a good blogger as long as you don’t go beyond the lines like hurting other people by means of blogging, that’s so barbaric, don’t do that. Blog because you want to express yourself. Don’t mind your grammatical errors, they are natural but don’t close yourself when it comes to people that tries to correct your compositions. Bashing is different from correcting. Corrections would really help you, believe me. Be open-minded to accept their opinions. Nevertheless, be thankful because someone’s correcting you, that’s one of the real proofs that they really read your blog, that’s something to be proud of, dear.
Blog as if hearts and reblogs doesn’t exist. Well it’s a fact that notes really help on motivating yourself to blog more. When people says notes don’t really matter, believe me, they’re just lying. Notes can make you feel like you’re a good blogger, notes can make you feel like you’re being appreciated by your co-bloggers, notes can inspire you to write more. Sorry to say this but when somebody liked and reblogged your post, it’s asdfghjkl feeling, right? So when you blog, think of what is the opposite. Don’t think of notes. Just think as if they don’t exist, think as if they aren’t implemented, so that when you blog and no one ever liked or reblogged your post, you won’t feel being unappreciated, you won’t feel disappointments on yourself. Yes having notes on your post is one of the wonderful feeling on being a blogger but it is just a bonus. Don’t stop blogging just because people don’t heart or reblog your post. Consider your silent readers, dear.
Blog because this is Tumblr. Everyday happenings aren’t always the same. Today’s may be a shit day for you because you failed on your check-up quiz or you had a terrible fight with your significant other, tomorrow might be an amazing day because your crush smiled at you or the next day might be just a normal day. These happenings might be one of the reasons why we blog, right? That’s why don’t be ridiculous just because you posted long emotional blog here in Tumblr. Always remember, this is Tumblr and not Facebook. People here always care to what’s happening to you, people here don’t see you as attention-seeker just because you posted like you feel the need to self harm, people here loves to read your blog everytime you’re having an amazing day, people here won’t say to you that you’re as hideous as a beast just because you felt like being one, because people here will eventually tell you that you are not because they exactly know that you are beautiful, because they know that you are created in the image and likeness of God. Just blog about everything, this is Tumblr, dear.


Blog like you don’t care. Grammar-freaks are everywhere. Whether you’re good at tenses or not, sucks at playing words or can write like a great poet, they will still examine your compositions just to get reasons to make you look awful to others, just so before you know it. Just blog and blog and blog, there’s so many things to blog about, don’t mind those people who are great in making you feel like you aren’t a good one, you’re good enough, you’re a good blogger as long as you don’t go beyond the lines like hurting other people by means of blogging, that’s so barbaric, don’t do that. Blog because you want to express yourself. Don’t mind your grammatical errors, they are natural but don’t close yourself when it comes to people that tries to correct your compositions. Bashing is different from correcting. Corrections would really help you, believe me. Be open-minded to accept their opinions. Nevertheless, be thankful because someone’s correcting you, that’s one of the real proofs that they really read your blog, that’s something to be proud of, dear.

Blog as if hearts and reblogs doesn’t exist. Well it’s a fact that notes really help on motivating yourself to blog more. When people says notes don’t really matter, believe me, they’re just lying. Notes can make you feel like you’re a good blogger, notes can make you feel like you’re being appreciated by your co-bloggers, notes can inspire you to write more. Sorry to say this but when somebody liked and reblogged your post, it’s asdfghjkl feeling, right? So when you blog, think of what is the opposite. Don’t think of notes. Just think as if they don’t exist, think as if they aren’t implemented, so that when you blog and no one ever liked or reblogged your post, you won’t feel being unappreciated, you won’t feel disappointments on yourself. Yes having notes on your post is one of the wonderful feeling on being a blogger but it is just a bonus. Don’t stop blogging just because people don’t heart or reblog your post. Consider your silent readers, dear.

Blog because this is Tumblr. Everyday happenings aren’t always the same. Today’s may be a shit day for you because you failed on your check-up quiz or you had a terrible fight with your significant other, tomorrow might be an amazing day because your crush smiled at you or the next day might be just a normal day. These happenings might be one of the reasons why we blog, right? That’s why don’t be ridiculous just because you posted long emotional blog here in Tumblr. Always remember, this is Tumblr and not Facebook. People here always care to what’s happening to you, people here don’t see you as attention-seeker just because you posted like you feel the need to self harm, people here loves to read your blog everytime you’re having an amazing day, people here won’t say to you that you’re as hideous as a beast just because you felt like being one, because people here will eventually tell you that you are not because they exactly know that you are beautiful, because they know that you are created in the image and likeness of God. Just blog about everything, this is Tumblr, dear.

(Source: msshearty)

 
2 weeks ago —1063 notes





yes gah? my other accounts

i am heart and i am tweenteen;
it is yours to choose which is my name
 
 life. thoughts. letters.
memories. stories.
hundred things
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dahil tanga ka

contact me at
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